Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Minor Meltdown, Miracles & Mastectomy...

(Warning... this is a lot of information... so grab a cup of coffee or tea, and put your feet up! ...I promise a few giggles and lots of answered prayer)
Hi... it’s me Coco!  
I must say, a dog’s life is pretty delightful. I basically get to nap whenever and wherever I want. 

I get fed twice a day - like clockwork!  I can run, jump and basically romp around whenever I feel feisty... which by the way, is everyday.  I pretty much have no cares in the world!  I don’t have to make important decisions, except whether to chase the neighborhood cat or let it live one more day.  

I don’t have to pay bills or look for work. My job is just to be my mom’s BFF!   I know, it’s tough... but someone’s gotta do it!  

But there ARE times when I wish I were a person.  Like every time my mom leaves the house without me; 

or when she’s eating something that smells really yummy, but won’t share; 

or especially when she cries, and I can’t give her a big hug.  That’s when “licks” come in handy... I just lick her tears away. I had to do that this past Saturday...
She probably doesn’t want me to tell you this, but she threw herself a little pity-party this past Saturday.  No one was invited, except me (** oh, lucky me**).  

...Now that the “cat” is out of the bag (I knew cats couldn’t be trusted... oh wait, that’s right... I just spilled the beans!)... oh well... I better let her explain what happened this past week...
(Meltdown... Lynne-style)
After much frustration this past Thursday and Friday... leaving numerous messages; being placed on hold for what seemed like an eternity; being told conflicting information; not knowing what to do first but knowing that every call and appointment was intertwined with my finances, living situation, job-hunt, unemployment wages, and surgeries; being completely overwhelmed with both the tasks-at-hand and communicating with all my loved-ones; not getting any answers to the myriad of messages I’d left before the weekend...  ...yes, I hate to admit it, but I had a mini-meltdown on Saturday.  Let me just say that self-pity is not pretty!  
My big-girl pants were hanging around my ankles, tripping me as I went to the kitchen desperate to feed my “ugly-cry” with chocolate.  
(no picture here, because there’s no more chocolate to be found in the house)
I even shook my fists at God (sorry, Lord... I really didn’t mean it!) and complained about not having a husband!  Can you believe that?  Oh brother... like that really matters!  It must have been the combination of my teary stupor and from my chocolate hang-over!  
Coco just followed me from room to room, watching (with cocked head) as if saying, “What did I do... is it me; is it you?  Just tell me what to do... do you need some kisses?”

Thankfully by the evening, I pulled-up my big-girl pants and finally “got over myself”.  No one like’s a drama-queen!  Sunday came, Mother’s Day brunch was served up Mount Hermon-style with my mom and sis.  And I took a break from all the “tasks-at-hand”.
Monday rolled around, and I asked the Lord to give me a spirit of thanksgiving and hope EVEN if it was another “dead-end day!”  But as it turns out, Monday was NOT to be another dead-end day... instead it was Miracle Monday!
(Miracles... God-style)
Monday Morning: 
1) Made call-after-call-after-call-after-call... and (except for one) I actually reached honest-to-goodness LIVE people!  (Believe me, this is no small miracle!)
2) Somehow - (I know how... it’s a God-thang!) - I got a consultation appointment with a highly recommended surgeon for Wednesday (YES, TODAY) - literally his last day before leaving for two weeks.
Monday Afternoon:  
3)  ONLY due to the gracious offer of a dear friend to come with me, did I head down to the (county-run) Emeline Health Services office.  (Side note: My last experience there left much to be desired (I watched as a shackled prisoner dressed in an orange jumpsuit was ushered in by a Peace Officer), so I really wasn’t looking forward to heading down there again.... alone... (see that husband-thang creeps up again)). So with my friend by my side, off we went - even though I really felt like I needed to wait to hear back from that “ONE phone call” that no one was returning before I threw myself into this enormous healthcare bureaucracy nightmare! 
We walked in at about 3:30pm; were immediately directed to the appropriate office; which as it turned out was “empty”; waited for the signs of life; and after waiting not too long, spoke to Geneva who was really quite expressionless (at first), vague, and a-tad-barky with her suggestions on how I could “try” to get on a waiting list "tomorrow" and wait and "hope" to talk to “someone.”   

... But then something clicked, and she told us to wait while she investigated whether an “Intake Worker” had time to see us before they closed - no appointment, no guarantees.  
Long story - short... we were seen that afternoon, filled out all the paperwork; answered all the questions, and I walked out a couple of hours later completely covered for ALL my medical needs through a very special program called, Breast Cervical Cancer Treatment Program (BCCTP).  But wait... it gets even better.... are you ready... wait for it....
Because BCCTP is connected with Medi-Cal (which by the way, I did NOT qualify for on it’s own), I also have complete medical coverage for my skin cancer and the specialized surgery needed on my head!  In short, I have (eighteen months) of healthcare insurance that will cover 100% of ALL my medical needs during the entire 18 months.  In addition this program is so unique that it’s only offered to individuals ONCE IN A LIFETIME.  
Seriously?  I mean, really?.... I can’t make this stuff up... I can’t call it a coincidence!  So, can I just stop here and sing, 
“Praise God from whom all blessings flow... praise Him all creatures, hear me lo...  praise Him above ye Heavenly Hosts... praise Father, Son and Holy Ghost... AaaaaMEN!
(Mastectomy & Reconstruction... doctor-style)
Today at noon:
Given my family history, and after consulting with the breast surgeon, we’ve decided that a bi-lateral mastectomy (both breasts) may be the right treatment for me.  In the short run, this is a bit scary to me, but in the long run, I know I will have complete peace of mind.  Although mastectomy and reconstruction surgeries are far more invasive than a lumpectomy, it will take care of the problem (once and for all) and I won’t have to worry about breast cancer reoccurring and future surgeries down the road.  Plus, as far as I understand, this health care insurance should pay for the entire process... I will never have that opportunity again in my lifetime!
Don’t worry, I won’t sing again, but I do have so much to be thankful for!  
So here are my next steps/prayer requests:
  1. Schedule appointments with the Plastic Surgeon & Oncologist
  2. Coordinate a surgery date that works for all surgeons in late June
  3. Get prepared for some extended down time (depending on how the reconstruction goes, at least a couple of months).
  4. Scheduled head surgery for May 23rd... I’ve run into a potential snag.  My current doctor may NOT be a Medi Cal provider, so I may have to go somewhere else to have that done.  I was hoping to have that surgery with healing time (2-4 wks) done before my bi-lateral mastectomy in June.  If I have to change doctors the timing may be off.
  5. Investigate whether I qualify for Disability Insurance (since I won’t be able to look for full-time work until I’m completely healed) and NOT jeopardize my healthcare.
Well, now that I’ve completely overwhelmed you all, let me say an HUBER - GINORMOUS - TO THE MOON & BACK - THANK YOU!!!!  I’ve told more than one person, assisting me along the way, that they’ve been divinely appointed due to an army of prayers going up on my behalf, and I truly believe that!  Thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart!
Lovingly, Lynne 


  1. And I think about the way God goes before us, before we can even comprehend what is coming. So you needed to lose the job, so that you would get the care.. and everything that was blockage God turns into a gift.

    Praying for you daily!
    PS Maybe you'll you meet a cute doctor ;)

    1. okay... you just made me laugh out loud!! :) Thanks Con... for all your prayers. Your insights into God's sovereignty are priceless! xoxo

  2. Thank you for your honesty and letting me know how I can be praying for you. I wish I was there to give you a big hug! God is so good with covering the medical care!

    1. Thanks Kathryn! I feel your hug coming through the screen! xoxo

  3. Rejoicing with you Lynne! God is good, He does provide. Wow - Miracle Monday is right! Look forward to seeing you next week at some point, even if it is after your surgery and just sitting by your side. Love and hugs - Robin

  4. Looking forward to it Robin! xoxo

  5. Lynn, don't feel bad about a mini meltdown - I would have had a MAJOR meltdown long ago! You were just expressing yourself - nothing wrong with that. Remember the tantrums David used to have and expressed them in Psalms? And God called him a man after his own heart. You are a woman after His own heart! As shown by Miracle Monday! Answered prayers - 100% medical coverage - wow! Very sorry to hear about the double mastectomy but i am glad that you are allowing people to help you - please allow them to come to your home after the surgery and care for you, and bring you food, etc. You are blessing them by letting them do that for you!

    1. Hi Lisa,

      You're the 2nd friend who's mentioned David's laments! Thank you for that reminder... of course, David was running for his life, but I do like being given permission to "lose it" once in a while. :) Crying is such a release!

      I hope you are doing well! Too bad you can't bring me some nice boerewors from South Africa while I'm re-cooping! :) Hmmm... memories! Praying for you!

  6. Cathy and I send our prayers and thoughts. If you want to get away, the Blairsville B&B is open any time....

    Much love,


  7. Thank you T for that wonderful offer... I just may take you up on it sometime! Love you guys and sure appreciate your prayers!

  8. What a thorough update and HUGE answer to prayer about the insurance!!!!!

    I am concerned about one thing you said, though. PLEASE BE AWARE that double masectomy does NOT mean you never need to worry about getting breast cancer again. Yes, it greatly reduces your chances, but it is impossible to remove every single breast cell, and as long as you have one left, the cancer can reoccur. I don't mean to be a wet blanket, but my Hematlogist/Oncologist (breast specialist) has told me that the number of woman who die of breast cancer after double alarmingly high. This is because these women think they are "home free', but they still need annual mammograms, so please be aware of this and continue to get checked, ok? Love you!

  9. Hi Ellyn,

    I just went to the post office and received your sweet card and generous gift! I don't know what to say... I'm so in awe of the love and care I'm receiving from my loved-ones. It's humbling and a tad uncomfortable for me, but nonetheless part of God's miracles in my life... so from the bottom of my heart - thank you! I would love to see you one of these days soon. Maybe you can come over one evening while I'm re-cooperating and and watch a movie with me! Love you and so appreciate your support, care and love! xoxo

    1. Movie night sounds great! I 'll bring the chocolate!